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The AbsurdistThe Absurdist

Monday, July 26, 2004
  Ja Rule in a jailbird ruling? The Absurdist says Yes.

Miniature American rapper Ja Rule is due in Toronto court today for an apparent assault charge at a Toronto nightclub. When the Absurdist caught up with the diminutive hip hop entertainer, we only had the chance to pose one question before he was ushered off by authorites.

The Absurdist: Mr. Rule, what was the cause of the June 5th nightclubbing incident?

Ja Rule: They tried to take my precious! My own, my precious!

The incarcerated rapstar then called me a "fat hobbit" and threw Elvish bread in my face. That little runt better smarten up soon or someone's going to push the little bastard over a cliff one day.
 

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