Ricky Martin is not gay
Dashing the hopes of thousands of Puerto Rican loving homosexuals the world over, Ricky Martin has stepped out of the closet of his heterosexuality.I am a normal man. I love women and sex.
" quoth the swivel hipped, latin singer.
As the internet clammers to uproot any evidence
to support or to contrast (you dirty filthy gossip bitches know who you are!), The Absurdist legal defense department notes the following:
Ricky Martin admits to loving women. Ricky Martin admits to loving sex. Ricky Martin does not explicitly admit to loving sex with women
. We rest our case.