Comic books are soooo gay
What started out as a mild Saturday Night Live satire, i.e. the Ambiguously Gay Duo
, has metamorphasized into a bona fide homosexual superhero/superheroine zeitgeist. Not one, but two significant superhero closet door splinterings have occured within the span of days. DC comics, announcing the newly revamped Batwoman as a full fledged queer
, finally acknowledges that the majority of their actual comic-book reading female fans are, indeed, lesbians. Furthermore, and coincidentally timed with the release of the Brett Ratner
lensed X-Men 3 movie, Marvel Comic mutant "Colossus" was outed as a gay man
. Colossus's mutant power is to turn his circuit-boy physique into solid, organic steel- a pairing of steel and gay maleness that puts copyright lawyers of a notorius Toronto gay male strip revue
into a heel-grinding frenzy. Personally, I've always found comic book heros, with their improbably musculature and obsession with spandex codpieces to hint, if not outright burn, of homosexual proclivities. Plus with the anti-gay-marriage electioneering going on in the US, it just goes to prove you can't keep a fierce faggot down.
[originally appeared in This Magazine